The Mental Funny Bone

Episode 31: Blair Witch was Real

• Gaster Girls • Season 3 • Episode 6

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Join Sarah and Christine as they dive deep into their past with hilarious and nostalgic high school stories, discuss the Steelers football game, their love for meditation, and the possible idea of attending a meditation retreat. Along the journey, they touch on personal mental health struggles, the significance of specific songs for fans, and their endearing admiration for Beanie Bishop. Tune in for an entertaining mix of humor, heartfelt memories, and mental wellness insights.

How to find mental health help when you're struggling. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists
https://washingtoncountyhumanservices.com/agencies/behavioral-health-developmental-services
https://www.alleghenycounty.us/Services/Human-Services-DHS/Publications/Resource-Guides
Apps - Just search mental health where you get your apps.
EAP programs are a great place to look for help!!

Additional Resources (Sports Related):
https://globalsportmatters.com/health/2020/12/04/mental-health-resources-2/

Sarah:

Hello and welcome to the Mental Funny Bone, Becoming the Gaster Girls. I'm Sarah.

Chrus:

It scares me every time you just start with it. I think that's why I mess it up every time

Sarah:

I don't understand. So this is what 30, 30 some episodes plus a couple interviews.

Chrus:

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah,

Sarah:

I'm not exactly sure how you're shocked by it. I guess that's what I'm confused

Chrus:

I don't I don't know. I don't know Anyway, uh, I'm Christine and I don't know anything about psychology other than that one class I had in high school With oh, what was that guy's name? do you remember the psychology teacher's name at the high school?

Sarah:

Why don't, why do I think it was Mr. Hearn?

Chrus:

No, it wasn't Mr.

Sarah:

Cause I, cause that's who I had when I said Placebo and I swear that was psychology class.

Chrus:

it might, it was different. I'm

Sarah:

Or did I make it up? Did I make that up?

Chrus:

That might have been psychology class. I

Sarah:

How did Mr. Hearn teach psychology? I feel like that's not right. I just, Mr. Hearn, I just, He teaches gym, right? No, that was Chucky. That was Amor. I got them confused.

Chrus:

Because they look the same.

Sarah:

I got the, is that what I was doing? That's what I was doing. Mr. Amor. And I almost called him by his first name. And that's not what I'm supposed to call him. Cause I'm a student.

Chrus:

right, and we all remember his first name. This is where we're going to lose a lot of listeners because I feel like he was also beloved by many a child at

Sarah:

I loved him. These are teachers that I love. These are teachers that were great. gym teachers, really? That was my jam.

Chrus:

these are teachers that I didn't appreciate.

Sarah:

I love them. I also like the English teachers. There was, I got along with most of my teachers. There was only like two or three. That one where I went in and we just printed out pictures of the word feces and taped it all over the wall. I don't even remember who was teaching that class or what class that was.

Chrus:

was it art? I feel like you had nine art classes in

Sarah:

Oh, for sure.

Chrus:

and then you took a gym class. And you asked me, should I take calculus? I was like, I don't see how you're ever going to need that.

Sarah:

I don't know why you, why would you? Take that class where you carry that flower baby around all day.

Chrus:

What was that about? I have to disconnect my iPhone from the headset because it's

Sarah:

Oh no.

Chrus:

continue connecting and disconnecting forever.

Sarah:

making bad things happen. okay, so yeah, Mr. Hearn taught psychology, so that, I guess that makes sense. I don't know what Mr. Hearn's degree was in. I don't, Secondary education.

Chrus:

Yeah. Can you still hear me? Cause I think something bad happened.

Sarah:

No, I can still hear you.

Chrus:

All right, fine. technology. Placebo. remember. I was like, and I was so excited to take psychology class. So excited and I thought that the guy who taught it like Was some kind of gypsy magician who could automatically,

Sarah:

This shit we make up. And there's a chance Mr. Hearn didn't even teach it. I made that up. I don't know. I'm fairly certain I've made a lot of shit up

Chrus:

I can't,

Sarah:

a lot of shit.

Chrus:

I was just expecting him to look deep into my soul and understand me as a person in psychology class. And he was like, what do you

Sarah:

Placebo.

Chrus:

He's Gasser, what? and it was, Jenny Steen. Jenny Steen.

Sarah:

Was he A. Ron? Was he that teacher?

Chrus:

He was that teacher. I think he,

Sarah:

D nice!

Chrus:

You done messed up. Jaquelin. Jaquelin. It's the best skit. It's so funny. Immediately, when we hang up, that is, I'm gonna watch it on YouTube.

Sarah:

And it's one of those that I could watch over and over again. If you don't know what we're talking about, just go online and, I don't know, search A RON.

Chrus:

Key and Peele.

Sarah:

You'll find it. You'll find it. And you will thank us for the rest of your life because you'll come back to that skit when you've had a bad day and you will watch that and you will cry because it's so fucking funny.

Chrus:

What's the principal's name? Oh, Shaughnessy?

Sarah:

Yeah, I'm going to have to

Chrus:

I can't!

Sarah:

it because it's super, super fantastic. Anyway. yeah, we're going to talk a little bit about mental health, but we're not professionals.

Chrus:

yeah,

Sarah:

check out the links in our show notes if you need help or, you can, dial 988. There you have it.

Chrus:

sorry. I had to chug some Red Bull. Um

Sarah:

was waiting for her to say

Chrus:

well I stayed up late last night Yes, ma'am.

Sarah:

There are so many things I want to talk about today and nothing did I write down. Go ahead.

Chrus:

you want to talk about this dealer game? Did you want to talk about my renewed passion for stealer football?

Sarah:

Oh, because they're winning. Or just because last night's game was good.

Chrus:

I think last night's game

Sarah:

because you watched it.

Chrus:

That game against the Jets was good. think it's because I haven't been home and when I'm home, I could give, two squirts of piss. About whether or not, like the only time I care is if I'm going to go grocery shopping, because then I'll go during the Steeler

Sarah:

Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. That makes sense. I have always been in love with the Steelers. not always, but like in recent years, like after college and no, I think I started liking the Steelers when we were in Arizona

Chrus:

Cause you're not

Sarah:

not that I didn't like them, but I was just never it wasn't like a really big deal until that when we lived in Arizona, that's when I became a true Steelers fan. in recent years, I have loved them for one reason.

Chrus:

What is that reason?

Sarah:

T, J. Watt. Yeah,

Chrus:

he had a very, he had one sack last night. And if you never watched a Steeler football game, based on the commentary of the, yappy people that talk about the football, you would have thought that TJ Wyatt. might've just got done walking on water. his job,

Sarah:

too. He does that too. Shut up. You're ruining it. You're fucking ruining it. He's amazing. Yeah, that's his job. That's his job, but he does it really fucking good.

Chrus:

his job is to sack the quarterback and he only did it once last night.

Sarah:

I'm going to go, but I'm going to take it back. I'm going to take it back because you, The one who needs the continued reassurance that you're doing your job well, let TJ have his moment. But the thing is, he's not just sacking people. he's, it's a work of art. It's a work of fucking art.

Chrus:

Speaking of the Steelers defense, do you know, Beanie, Booger, Beanie Bates, Beanie,

Sarah:

Not until recently.

Chrus:

what is his last name? Because I know it's not Booger.

Sarah:

not a clue.

Chrus:

Beanie Bishop,

Sarah:

Beanie Bishop BB.

Chrus:

I, Beanie Bishop is my favorite tiny little defensive ever,

Sarah:

it up. He's tearing it

Chrus:

ever to walk on a football field. Um,

Sarah:

name's Beanie.

Chrus:

His name is Beanie.

Sarah:

Fuck off. I love him I'd want to fold him up put him in my pocket. Just carry him around with me everywhere

Chrus:

I love him. love, need to

Sarah:

gonna have to Google him and actually see what his face looks like Because sometimes that scares me when I see their actual faces. I'm like,

Chrus:

Oh, you look mean.

Sarah:

exactly what I expected you to look like. That's not what you look like with your helmet on. all I had to type in is Bean and it came right up. Beanie Bishop Jr.

Chrus:

Oh, he's a junior. Tiny little football

Sarah:

he's adorable. He has a smile on his face. His little

Chrus:

So excited to be there.

Sarah:

adorable.

Chrus:

he's so excited. to be there. Um, I need a, Beanie Bates, Beanie Bishop.

Sarah:

Bates.

Chrus:

don't know why he's Beanie Bates. I don't know.

Sarah:

Wonder if I could get a hold of his, what's that person called? Manager. Wonder if Beanie wants to be on our show.

Chrus:

He probably has some mental health things he wants to talk to us about. If we

Sarah:

He's 24 and he's in the NFL. he's, I feel like they should, they all should have some sort of mental,

Chrus:

like he clearly has anxiety that he everybody about, um,

Sarah:

he's gotta share it. Yeah,

Chrus:

yeah, make it happen. If we got Beanie Bishop on this show, I would piss my pants, like literally pee,

Sarah:

And then it, I get, Beanie knows TJ. And I'd like to have TJ and his wife, his cute little wife, who was a professional soccer player,

Chrus:

and all

Sarah:

with us. Yeah, and then we'll just have, we'll have the Watt brothers.

Chrus:

It'll be so fun. That's how we're gonna get. That's how we're gonna get known.

Sarah:

Yeah, For sure.

Chrus:

so let

Sarah:

get, yeah. So anybody out there, our 20 listeners, if anybody knows Beanie, let him know that we'd like to talk to him. He doesn't know how to talk about mental health. If he could just,

Chrus:

could tell us about his struggles walk walking on to the team, I don't know I feel like in my head he just showed up at practice one day and they were like, like on major league where the Wesley Snipes just runs in his jammies. Like I think he did that

Sarah:

Yeah, that's I guarantee that's exactly what happened. Exactly what happened. Oh, I got to turn my

Chrus:

your

Sarah:

My binger cuz that me and my noise aversions drives me insane

Chrus:

So last night during the second half of the sealer game, I shopped for a gold, sweatshirt with play renegade written on it in black letters for

Sarah:

did you see God? I'm sorry. I'm

Chrus:

45 minutes. I could not find one. a, I found a white one with yin's written on it. I found a gold play renegade.

Sarah:

Oh, why do you want a gold one?

Chrus:

Cause I want a gold one.

Sarah:

Oh, we'll see it.

Chrus:

Quit wanting, quit

Sarah:

asshole

Chrus:

what You. want. I can hear You. typing.

Sarah:

tee teee Yeah, because I have these fucking, these talons on my fingers. I can't type. I can't type. And every time my finger hits the keyboard, I Grrr. It's like these talons on a fucking scratch. On a scratch board.

Chrus:

What I did, what I did find last night was a t shirt that, that had the words Dippy Eggs on it.

Sarah:

Oh, I love tippy eggs. I found it right away. I found a t shirt.

Chrus:

Is it gold?

Sarah:

Okay. Yeah, it's gold. It says play renegade and it has the little stealer.

Chrus:

Nope. I don't want the sealer things on it and I don't want a t shirt. I don't know. I just don't.

Sarah:

You don't want a t shirt? What do you want?

Chrus:

No, I want a sweatshirt. It's cold.

Sarah:

god. How about I just get you, get one made for you?

Chrus:

Fine.

Sarah:

a Play Renegade long sleeve t shirt,

Chrus:

Sweatshirt.

Sarah:

I feel like Play Renegade's my thing anyway. I'm the one who's yelling at the Jimmy Buffett ban. To play Renegade in Key West. I don't understand why they wouldn't. The fuck nobody here's Nobody here likes the Steelers.

Chrus:

Why are you looking at me weird? Play Renegade. It's a song by Styx. Shoveling

Sarah:

let me pop another gummy in my mouth and see if that will help.

Chrus:

Styx of them in there. how collectively, as a fanbase, do we decide that we like Renegade the best out of all the songs? Like what happens like is there a DJ

Sarah:

have to look that up. Like how did Renegade become

Chrus:

like is there a DJ at the game and he's nah if we keep playing it They'll get on board. I'm just gonna do it I'm just gonna keep playing it and then like his buddy's like dude They're never gonna you're not gonna be able to bring You're not gonna be able to bring that back. Like when we were in Arizona and we tried to bring Champ back like we were calling everybody chump

Sarah:

Chomp.

Chrus:

we're trying to bring that back. calling

Sarah:

tried to bring so many things back.

Chrus:

Yeah,

Sarah:

so there is a story behind it.

Chrus:

Oh, no. Can you tell it to me concisely?

Sarah:

read it? May

Chrus:

I don't want you to read it I just want you? to tell it,

Sarah:

it starts out with such a great line though. The magic began on January 5th, 2002, during a half time, during a playoff game against Cleveland. The Browns held a 17 7 halftime lead. By the beginning of the second half, they stretched it out to 24 7. The Steelers were lagging. ha. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Okay, their offense. During the commercial break, the crew at Jumbotron made a choice that forever changed Pittsburgh history as the slow, Intro echoed out across the depressed fans. Everyone felt the sense of failure. Even the music controller gave up. Forty five seconds later, the atmosphere changed. The screams of the song gave fans a needed wake up call, and the stadium became alive with excitement. I think we won, is the whole

Chrus:

I feel like that

Sarah:

Oh, this is Tommy Maddox! Talia Maddox is the quarterback.

Chrus:

of course he was. I think this is the game where Myron Cope said fuck on the radio.

Sarah:

Oh, God, I really hope so. Pittsburgh ousted Cleveland in the fourth quarter. The final quarter was capped off with Chris Fatamala. and there you go. that's how it happened. now I have to, now I have to Google, when did Myron Cope say F on the air?

Chrus:

he was talking about a player and he was like, fuck, quad, fuck, quad.

Sarah:

Oh, that's Fatamala. Fuckwad.

Chrus:

I think he went to a Browns player.

Sarah:

Copesay,

Chrus:

quad.

Sarah:

This is going to become our new podcast. It's us just having random discussions and Googling everything.

Chrus:

who knows chat GPT.

Sarah:

Yeah, this is going to be yeah. Nothing came up like instantly. So when Myron Koch told Dan Snyder to stick his head in a Okay, all right, we're done but okay. Yeah, that was here we go. There's your renegade story for the day We have a newfound love of Beanie Bishop.

Chrus:

Love him. Can't get enough Beanie Bishop. Beanie Baby Bishop.

Sarah:

Yeah, I love it. And at one point on The Mannings ESPN Monday night football show, LL Cool J. I think it was the third quarter. LL Cool J was there. he's a Giants fan, whatever. But,

Chrus:

Whatever.

Sarah:

Eli showed him a picture of himself. Eli dressed up like a rapper with like chains. I'm fairly certain that LL Cool J pissed his pants. And how about that movie with LL Cool J and the shark? Remember that in Arizona?

Chrus:

And the, there was a lady, shark brain surgeon.

Sarah:

Yeah, they gave the shark a really smart brain and

Chrus:

Right. Then LL Cool J had to find it and kill it.

Sarah:

right, and he was

Chrus:

was the cook.

Sarah:

There were all sorts of things that just were terribly thought out, but man, L. O. Cool J. He saves everything.

Chrus:

there was a, there, there was also that snake movie with Ice Cube. Do you remember? Anaconda. There's snakes out there. There's snakes out there this big.

Sarah:

Then there's snakes on a plane.

Chrus:

So many

Sarah:

We could just keep going on. What's from the smart shark to the big snake to snakes on a plane?

Chrus:

Samuel L.

Sarah:

motherfucking snakes off of this plane.

Chrus:

I was like, that's not a real movie. Is that an SNL skit? it was a real movie. Okay,

Sarah:

went to see it only because of its name. 100 percent because Samuel L. Jackson was in it and the name of it was Snakes on a Plane.

Chrus:

we got, Again, just to carry on with the stream of consciousness that we have going on here, we, we got a little slap happy at one of the conferences, cause we had been saying hi to people and talking about it all day and around three 30, we started talking about Pulp Fiction and about, Brad and his big brain, sorry. that was work, right? Um, right. So when Samuel Jackson is in the apartment and he and John Travolta are trying to get the money back from the kids and they're like, look at the big brain on Brad. That's what, that's what somebody said to me as I was, giving my, presentation,

Sarah:

big brain on Christine.

Chrus:

right? They were like, first, congratulations. Look at the big brain on you.

Sarah:

Did they follow it up with a Bible verse?

Chrus:

They did Ezekiel 12,

Sarah:

I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger. I sat in my room with that tape, mind you.

Chrus:

going

Sarah:

pretty sure it was a tape. It might've been a CD though. No, it was definitely a tape. Rewinding it to learn that. because I thought it was just a line from a movie.

Chrus:

right? A hundred percent. Right. all So we have this podcast. Guys, where we have an outline for it. That's the same every week

Sarah:

We don't have an outline today, though, and this is what happened.

Chrus:

fan mail is what we do first. So did get some fan mail. we do have mail. Uh, mailed this week, Misty.

Sarah:

huh.

Chrus:

So do you want to tell you, you talk about it? Cause I think you might've read it and I

Sarah:

I had to email Misty a while back. Misty was, one of our earlier emailers. Yay, Misty. and I had referred to her in an episode, and I called her Emily. Which Make sense because Misty found us because of our mutual friend, Emily. So there you have it. So I emailed her to apologize cause I'm an idiot. she emailed back. This has, you could cut this out cause literally I'm telling a story like Noah. It has nothing to do with what, when I'm about to actually talk about. Um, Fuck.

Chrus:

Oh my God. Yeah. Carry a stream. The name of this episode is stream of consciousness. Fever dream. Stop making noises. Stop it. me what this email's about.

Sarah:

Misty wanted to let us know about her second visit to the therapist, which I thought was fantastic. Um, her second visit to the therapist, and I'm not sure how much we talked about this when we talked about Misty's email, but, hold on. My computer's telling me something and I don't know why. Okay. Okay. Misty's sister, died in, domestic violence situation, terrible situation. And anyway, leads us to the story. She was in her second visit to the therapist and therapist said, if your sister was sitting next to you, what would she say about you feeling her death is your fault? Misty immediately answered, That's the stupidest fucking thing I've ever heard. To me, it, this immediately made sense. I was like, alright, And the therapist just sits there staring at her in silence. And Misty follows that up with, she was really blunt. She didn't mince any words and the therapist said, Oh wait, are you saying your sister would tell you feeling this way is the stupidest thing she's ever heard?

Chrus:

god.

Sarah:

what she would say. And the therapist was like, Oh my gosh, I thought you were telling me that asking you what she would say was the stupidest thing ever.

Chrus:

Oh no.

Sarah:

Yeah. I thought it was fantastic because I immediately was like, Yeah, that's the sister's response as the blunt sister that I am, that would be my response. So that made sense to me, but I, the therapist was, can you imagine that being the therapist and being like, wow, all right,

Chrus:

guess that's how this is gonna go.

Sarah:

so yeah, I love that. I love that story. And the Missy also followed up. She wanted to let us know that she really enjoys the, enjoys this, enjoys the dry heaving sounds.

Chrus:

Ugh, why?

Sarah:

during BLEH!

Chrus:

There you go. That one's just for you, Misty. Bleh.

Sarah:

Yeah. And she was talking about, Halloween horror nights at, Walt Disney World and there were some visuals and smells and whatnot.

Chrus:

Do you remember when we took you to the haunted house?

Sarah:

Which is what I responded to her. I said, I think this is fantastic because I too am a scaredy cat of all things haunted Halloween shit, which is a huge, not a, not as scary. Like I love Halloween. I love dressing up. I do not. Like haunted houses and I did say in my email back to her that we would share Some of my haunted house stories because this episode will be released on Halloween.

Chrus:

If we're lucky. Um,

Sarah:

it will be a motherfucker. It will be

Chrus:

look at the brain on Sarah,

Sarah:

I will strike down. Okay,

Chrus:

vengeance and furious anger. I feel it.

Sarah:

yes anger.

Chrus:

so let's skip to our growing up Gaster story of the week.

Sarah:

Wait, do we have any more fan mail? I just want to see I feel like that was the only one.

Chrus:

to say to Sarah B slash Sarah K that I thought that I answered her email and when I was looking through the email just now I can see that I, it's a draft. I typed it and then didn't send it.

Sarah:

I love you. I do love you. before we move on, I would like to share that, Heather. S, I think we could say her name, Heather Schaefer, also known as Kyle, Heather Kyle, wherever, however you want to refer to her, informed us about a little

Chrus:

the Tic Tac ing.

Sarah:

There were buckets involved and get this shit. I feel like we didn't really know exactly how the corn got into the buckets, but it happened. So that's fine. But. And we'll get back to that. My favorite part of the story of tic tac ing is the fact that they used, they carried the corn around in tube socks. And even better than that, Heather had to clarify that they were clean tube socks.

Chrus:

I, I just love a world where four to seven male and or female, teenagers. Was just roaming the streets after dark,

Sarah:

With tube socks filled with hard corn.

Chrus:

chucking corn from the cornfield at somebody's house. And they weren't happy. Unless someone got pissed off. If they chucked the corn and everyone was like, Meh, tic tackers, meh. But if the front porch lights came on, then it was fun. the terrifying part of it was the fun part. I just love, I love that there is a, that there is a world where someone's mom had the buckets ready for the corn.

Sarah:

And I'm mad that he didn't experience this. Cause I really I would like to experience this in our early twenties with you, because I feel like once that's the time in my life where I feel like I would have definitely, I'd probably do it now, but I would definitely have. I would have waited until there's just like a fistful of corn left in that tube sock and then beat you over the head with it.

Chrus:

you woulda homie the clowned me. square in the back of the head.

Sarah:

That's exactly this is what I thought of as we talked about it. Yeah. but so I asked Heather about getting the hard corn off the cob because I still am challenged to understand how this is happening. And Heather's dad helped her with that and let her know that it was a challenge. He's, I don't think we're really sure how it happened, but it was definitely a challenge.

Chrus:

pull it off.

Sarah:

But when you do this, I mean it's a round, it is a round, like it's not,

Chrus:

But you just got to get like a grip on one of them and then the rest of them kind of chuck off. I bet that's why it would hurt your thumb because you're like, Pulling them

Sarah:

oh, yeah, he said his thumbs hurt.

Chrus:

right because you're trying to get your thumbs in there to I'm assuming

Sarah:

you get it started, you can get going, but getting it started I think is where I was,

Chrus:

that would have been the bitch of it. Yeah.

Sarah:

Yeah. Okay. All righty. Yeah, so there you go. More, more. Talking about tic tacking. And I did write down, I want to learn the history of tic tacking. Didn't get to that yet. Since Sunday though.

Chrus:

plenty of time I have two other sort of housekeeping announcements. Uh, another episode of bare bones banter. So for of you guys who might not have seen it, as you scrolled past it to get to this episode, we had a chance to sit down with Jesse Pakowski.

Sarah:

There's no k. I mean there's a K at the end.

Chrus:

There's, there is a K.

Sarah:

It's a T, but it's, Jesus, for fuck's sake. Oh, there is a K, there is a K, it's P U T K O S K I, and I said it during the interview and was like, oh, that seems simple enough. But now I,

Chrus:

I Like Kelly, like Kelly Kapowski.

Sarah:

Kapowski, I get where you were going before, okay, but Pakowski,

Chrus:

Whatever. Jessie!

Sarah:

fuck,

Chrus:

you're amazing. You do great work. She is the, area director, for, the Southwestern Pennsylvania chapter of the AFPS. SP.

Sarah:

S P, American Foundation for Suicide Prevention,

Chrus:

Every time I'm going to screw it up every time. Um, but it was a really interesting interview and it was really interesting to, to hear how Jesse got to be involved in that organization and to hear about some of the stuff that they're doing and, um, to carry forward from there. I know that you've talked to, you've talked to them about doing some stuff with, With soccer coaches and at Montour

Sarah:

Yeah, I'm waiting. I'm waiting to hear back. we've, I don't know if I've mentioned it on here, but, locally, we've had a few, student athletes, not in our school district, but neighboring school districts. Die from suicide in the past few weeks. So I reached out to our soccer coaches and asked them if they would be interested in having Jesse and the group come and do a presentation. So it is now in the coach's hands to talk to, the administration. There's a lot of approval shit that has to happen. hopefully I will be getting some word and we'll be able to get Jesse into Montour in some capacity.

Chrus:

that would be amazing. And

Sarah:

our coaches were overwhelmingly. In support of it. So that was, that just made my heart happy.

Chrus:

yeah. And, I think the more we can talk again, the more you talk about it, the less scary it is, the less frequently we have to hear people say Like it's something to be ashamed of or something to be hidden or swept under the rug when that doesn't really help anybody. And big shout out to Jackie Faircloth. bringing a couple of people together. So Jesse and a few of the administration type people at all are Alma mater, Elizabeth So looking forward to seeing more, seeing more good things happen. So if you get a chance to listen to the interview, do it. And, Thanks again to Jesse. Oh, what? Oh, what? No, no. I'm still here. I'm still here. No, no. That'll be great.

Sarah:

Okay, Okay.

Chrus:

I'm

Sarah:

I hope you got me saying, You frozen, girl.

Chrus:

I did. Yeah, that'll all be, it'll all be seamless in there.

Sarah:

Yeah, I can't wait.

Chrus:

so thank you so much, Jesse. I really appreciate you taking the time and talking to us and really appreciate everything that you're doing out in the community. So yay. Thumbs up. Good job. Good job us. also a little bit of housekeeping. I have cleaned up a lot of the, videos on, on YouTube. So if you guys want to go out and check out some of our videos on YouTube, I tried to create a playlist, but I think I only created it for me and not to post on the website. Cause my, my YouTube knowledge isn't that great. So, keep checking back on our YouTube channel because you do have to see the facial expressions that we make.

Sarah:

I feel like it makes it I don't know. I think Noah was annoyed with it just because of the cutting up of it because of

Chrus:

You got to cut out the words. you could still see what we're saying.

Sarah:

yeah, but that's fine. Whatever. check out the YouTubes and I am gonna attempt to create an actual website for us.

Chrus:

it's all happening, folks. It's all happening,

Sarah:

Let's do we're gonna do a newsletter or some shit so we can send you emails that you'll never read.

Chrus:

Oh, won't that be exciting?

Sarah:

I can't wait.

Chrus:

I'm getting

Sarah:

I'm going to put little nuggets of information just to see if people read. I used to do that when I was on the safety committee at Geyer Printing. I was the notes lady because I was the only girl. So of course I was the secretary. and I would write shit in the notes. the one guy, he, we had to do a report cause he cut his hand on the tape measure because he let it slide back across his hand in a manner that he shouldn't have. And I wrote in there, sometimes common sense really helps in this job. Then every once in a while, cause we ate pizza, pizza all the time during these, I would note in between the lines, how many pieces of pizza everybody ate during the meeting just to see if anybody read them. Cause I figured. Somebody's got to read this and come to me and be like, Hey, that's either funny or you're an asshole.

Chrus:

inappropriate.

Sarah:

One. Yeah.

Chrus:

I love that. I can't wait to do that. You can't do that with us, though, because we forget what we say immediately after we close our laptops.

Sarah:

That is true.

Chrus:

On these episodes.

Sarah:

we're not very good at keeping track of what we've talked about. And when we have episodes like this where we have nothing written down, we're gonna do this whole show again next week.

Chrus:

mystery.

Sarah:

We'll actually write it down for next week and then do it all over again.

Chrus:

Remember that Fever Dream episode?

Sarah:

Sheesh.

Chrus:

You're gonna have to be more specific. Okay, so weekly catch up corner, I feel like we just did that. so I'm in Raleigh, again, cause it's, Olivia's last couple of soccer games and I could catch two of them if I came down and stayed.

Sarah:

I love that. I also love that I sent her a little snap this morning to let her know that I loved her and She responded and said it feels weird that you're not here with my mom.

Chrus:

right. It does feel weird and I don't like it.

Sarah:

said, I don't like it I would rather I would very much like to be there

Chrus:

Do you know where we ate on Saturday?

Sarah:

where

Chrus:

We ate at that barbecue place downtown.

Sarah:

oh, yeah the barbecue place after moving that we went to I love that place

Chrus:

thought it was an anomaly. I'm like, I was just really hungry, no

Sarah:

it was I don't think it was I

Chrus:

smokehouse. so if anyone knows those guys that they do some nice barbecue delicious.

Sarah:

and just the amount of food that we got for the price was insane

Chrus:

I've eaten it three times because we got I got burnt ends and I got four pounds of burnt ends, right Homer Simpson good,

Sarah:

a burnt end. I'm now slobbering.

Chrus:

delicious And a quick shout out to Yvonne and Mike for coming to lives game on Saturday

Sarah:

yay

Chrus:

always super fun to hang out with them. Um,

Sarah:

Okay,

Chrus:

but between me and you, Olivia played really well.

Sarah:

then who gives a shit

Chrus:

I was like,

Sarah:

played well, yeah fuck it

Chrus:

I was like,

Sarah:

she was happy with her performance. That's all that matters.

Chrus:

And then she, she was complaining the whole time we were eating about how tired and how sore she was. and I'm like, Oh, that'll be fine. Just come over to, just come over to the Airbnb and we'll watch the World Series. And she texted me immediately after she got back. And she's Hey, I'm going to the club.

Sarah:

Yeah.

Chrus:

I was like,

Sarah:

okay.

Chrus:

what a miracle,

Sarah:

wonderful. Yeah. I had to explain to Owen yesterday, soreness versus actually being injured.

Chrus:

right? Your legs just

Sarah:

did take him to the doctor. he did fall. He did. Or hit his head. Okay, whatever. But

Chrus:

good at parenting.

Sarah:

so I took him to, I had to take him to the doctor cause he wouldn't shut up about it.

Chrus:

Just like the time he broke his thumb.

Sarah:

And I figured this was his head and his neck, so we really needed to get it checked out. So I only waited two days instead of a week

Chrus:

you thumb. I was like, what?

Sarah:

the amount of times that I had to say to the doctor in hindsight, as Owen's telling the story of how he hurt himself. I'm like, in hindsight, maybe we should have gone to children's.

Chrus:

to be fair. To be fair, I still say it now, when I take Olivia to the doctor, she's in her tw like, no, she's 19. But, still, I'm like, I guess we could have approached that, differently.

Sarah:

I mean I don't and then last night he's you know complaining about being his back and this and I was like dude You are sore. We went to the doctor. We had the x rays done. There is like you're good The doctor says you're fine. You were sore. This will happen throughout your life And then I said, it's, think about your dad. He feels like that every day. So anyway, sorry. Go ahead.

Chrus:

Fakir Brown is the player's name that Myron Cope mispronounced.

Sarah:

So if you've been looking for it the whole time, like how did you just find it? Did you text somebody?

Chrus:

No, I just remembered. I was like, what is Freddy Fuqua? And no, cause he's a seventies player. He had the goldfish in the heels of his platform shoes.

Sarah:

I do remember. I remember the story about him. I don't. I don't really remember him.

Chrus:

true story. And I was like, it's not Fuqua, Fakir. And Marron Cope's Fakir?

Sarah:

here?

Chrus:

And he's like, not right.

Sarah:

Is it another tribe? Like the, where the fuck are we tribe?

Chrus:

Kind of, I'm guessing.

Sarah:

We're fuck here.

Chrus:

Oh my god, stop.

Sarah:

Okay.

Chrus:

Stop.

Sarah:

Okay. Okay.

Chrus:

Okay. Now I have the YouTube clip of that, so I will put that in the show notes so everyone can enjoy Myron Cope going, fuck here, Brown. I can't be right.

Sarah:

You need to text it to me. I need to see it.

Chrus:

I will definitely do that to you. do that for you. Not to you. Um,

Sarah:

it's weird.

Chrus:

sorry, I was

Sarah:

you not to do anything to me. Bleh!

Chrus:

Stop gagging. Okay. Growing up Gaster story of the week. So let's talk about the time we took you to a haunted house as an adult.

Sarah:

Yeah, because I feel like there's two Haunted House stories that at least I remember. One is as I say kid, but I was old enough to remember it, so I feel like I was probably too old to be acting the way that I was. And then the adult one. So I will let you tell, though. You tell.

Chrus:

I think the first one we went to a haunted house in Elizabeth, but it was the

Sarah:

hall?

Chrus:

Victory Haunted House. Does that,

Sarah:

remember. It was in one of our local fire hall

Chrus:

right, like an, like an

Sarah:

yeah.

Chrus:

I seem to remember,

Sarah:

I remember only one thing about it.

Chrus:

in the Buena Vista area of Elizabeth.

Sarah:

feel like that's where it was. Yeah.

Chrus:

Buena Vista, if, uh, if you live anywhere else. Um, yeah, I think this was like elementary school because, you were in elementary school for sure. I think I was in junior high because I ran into somebody that I knew and I was mortified because I was with, I I don't think our dad was

Sarah:

remember mommy being there, which is very confusing to me because I can't, they had to, somebody, it had to be a group of us and mommy had to be bribed with cigarettes or something because I cannot imagine, or just getting the fuck out of the house is what she was bribed with actually. She was like, you know what, we're gonna leave Jumbo at home and go to the haunted house.

Chrus:

it it might have been a, PTG activity.

Sarah:

Oh,

Chrus:

Teacher Guild, I believe.

Sarah:

guild?

Chrus:

Guild at uh, St. Michael's. We didn't, the Catholic schools didn't have a PTA, they had a PTG. So I think this was a PTG activity. Oh, I remember. Your mom was real active in it.

Sarah:

she was the bomb.

Chrus:

active in everything. oh, oh, hey, Gaster, your mom's here. I'm like, I know, she always is.

Sarah:

I loved it.

Chrus:

you're just saying that because when she listens, she's gonna like you best.

Sarah:

No, I legit did. I legit do remember, Mami being at everything. Mostly cause I got to leave with her. I didn't have to ride the bus home.

Chrus:

Right. so I think we took you in and you were definitely old enough where you should not have, had a

Sarah:

spastic meltdown.

Chrus:

like toddler temper tantrum in one of the rooms to the point where the people that work there were like eyed staring at you and your mother. I think she had to pick you up and carry you out as like

Sarah:

they shut it down so I could get, to get me the fuck out of there is what they did. They pushed us out of a back door.

Chrus:

in her arms.

Sarah:

I was as tall as mummy at this point probably.

Chrus:

You weighed at least 85 pounds

Sarah:

Yep, and I wasn't having one bit of it.

Chrus:

and I think I had to go with you and I think that's where I saw somebody I knew from junior high

Sarah:

yeah, that was super embarrassing for you. I'm sorry that I ruined your life so many times.

Chrus:

and I'm pretty sure it was a boy that I had a crush on.

Sarah:

guaranteed,

Chrus:

Obviously it would

Sarah:

in all of his mullet tight jean glory.

Chrus:

They were probably acid washed. He out.

Sarah:

Yep. Yep. That's it. That

Chrus:

And then, and then when we were grownups, I know we were grownups because I had already, we had already moved back from Arizona. working, you were working on your degree in earnest.

Sarah:

And being a bartender,

Chrus:

Yeah, right.

Sarah:

best job ever in my whole entire life. Yeah, it's,

Chrus:

beer with us everywhere we go. Because I think we loaded up into somebody's car and he's like, where are we going to put the cooler? I was like, the what?

Sarah:

excuse me.

Chrus:

What are we doing?

Sarah:

in his defense, we were driving to West Virginia.

Chrus:

It is far. I was thirsty. after

Sarah:

longer than 20 minutes.

Chrus:

after he put the cooler in the car, it wasn't like I was like, no, I'm not going to have

Sarah:

no. yeah.

Chrus:

Nobody else in the car was like, no, we're good. We're not going to drink before we go to the haunted house in, uh, some scary prison in West Virginia that's famous. There it is. That's it. So we go there.

Sarah:

will never forget it. I will never go back. Motherfuckers.

Chrus:

we, we don't realize how scary it's going to be, we get in there and they shove Sarah into a prison cell and the door and then walk away.

Sarah:

Yeah, they shoved us in there and we were each in our own prison cell and they're telling us scary stories and I'm not liking it at all and you're in the cell next to me laughing as I am legit losing my fucking mind.

Chrus:

You're

Sarah:

there was definitely some spirits in there with me. There definitely was not in there alone. I don't give a fuck what anybody says or believes I, somebody was hanging out with me and just. Fucking love and life laughing at me and then they call out numbers and they didn't call out mine.

Chrus:

You and Zach Baggins were in there. Yeah. They called out my mind or popped right open. I walked out. And then we left you.

Sarah:

No, this is where No, my boyfriend at the time left me. You and Kimmy and Dale stuck behind. Don't you remember Kimmy yelling at the guy? I work for an attorney's office. You better open this door now.

Chrus:

we were like, you're okay. You're

Sarah:

legit having a I couldn't breathe.

Chrus:

It's fine. She's fine. She's fine She's having a mental health issue. She's fine.

Sarah:

I was not fine in the slightest. It still makes my hands sweat

Chrus:

Right. Who's, who was your, was it Kokomo? It had to be

Sarah:

I thought Dale was going to beat somebody up

Chrus:

right because that's

Sarah:

would have let him. I would have let him beat somebody up. I don't give a fuck. then we get out of it and they take us through the rest of it. And the rest of it was like a joke. Do you remember that? And like people were popping out and I was like, fuck you. I was just a Helen back. Get the hell out of my way.

Chrus:

I had a panic attack, man. Get your fake chainsaw out of my

Sarah:

you were not scaring me, you six year old douche.

Chrus:

I've written, then we went to the bar after to talk about it. So,

Sarah:

think I might have got drunk.

Chrus:

we were in our twenties. It seemed to be the thing to do

Sarah:

I think it was a Friday. Although Wednesdays were also really good for the getting drunk, too.

Chrus:

today to celebrate

Sarah:

It's Wednesday. Sarah, why are you drunk? It's Wednesday.

Chrus:

I'm a bar.

Sarah:

I'm drunk?

Chrus:

I'm a bartender. Of course I'm drunk on Wednesday.

Sarah:

Oh, shit.

Chrus:

Ridiculous. this reminds me of when we saw the Blair Witch Project.

Sarah:

Oh

Chrus:

you please take us through this story? it's not a Halloween story, But I feel like It is

Sarah:

It is a perfect example of what a puss I am. Cause I would still act the same way today. Cause it is, it was frightening. Okay. now that we know things, but like when we first saw it, I didn't know what Blair Witch, I didn't know anything fucking about it. We walked in. I thought it was just a regular ass fucking movie. I didn't. And then it starts and then there's videos and then there's snot and then there's kids hands and there's what? The fuck is happening. Like it was a lot of scary fucking shit.

Chrus:

I remember sitting in that movie theater looking around What? What? Is this a documentary?

Sarah:

Like you were even freaked out. don't

Chrus:

No, no. Oh,

Sarah:

it was fucking freak. Now, granted, you handle your freaked outness way better than I do, but I was scared to death. I cannot believe I walked out of there with dry pants. I honestly cannot.

Chrus:

right.

Sarah:

it took all three of us a while to recover. We had to go drink after, which I know, okay, just, we were going to do that anyway, but it was a much more intense drinking experience after the Blair Witch

Chrus:

Like, we didn't go to a club. we We had

Sarah:

just had to

Chrus:

take a step back.

Sarah:

drink. And talk about what we just saw and try to process it and then find out it's real.

Chrus:

I'm like, is this,

Sarah:

have. It's real. It's, that really happened. that's legit. Like this fucking happened. So at the time we were living in a tiny apartment, I was sleeping on your couch.

Chrus:

Because it's summertime.

Sarah:

you were in your bedroom with your, your first husband. And, I was sleeping on the couch and I, It was scary out there by myself.

Chrus:

can you let me in? I was like, what? Yeah, come on in, what's up? And then you just crawled in the bed, and you stayed there. And I look at Mike, and Mike looks at me, and I was like, so this is happening? Not in

Sarah:

was 21.

Chrus:

in the good way,

Sarah:

Not the way you were hoping.

Chrus:

right? Not the way you've been thinking about for months, I would imagine. But yeah, in this very different fine, in this very different fine, I'll sleep in the middle kind of way

Sarah:

yeah, I couldn't sleep on the couch by myself and not, and I couldn't even sleep on the floor. the floor was probably fucking filthy, so in my defense, it probably wasn't an option. Wasn't an option. yeah, no, I had to get, I had to sleep in bed with you guys. Maybe for a couple days.

Chrus:

no. It was just one night

Sarah:

Was it just the one night? You put a stop to that.

Chrus:

like,

Sarah:

We gotta find you a boyfriend. Get the fuck out of here.

Chrus:

let's call Hobbit Steve and see if he's available.

Sarah:

Him and his hairy little feet.

Chrus:

I feel like after we can't find Hobbit Steve, we'll call a couple of those people we slept in a van down by the river.

Sarah:

Oh, we're never going to, Oh, wow.

Chrus:

Right.

Sarah:

stories. So many great stories. So yeah, that's, I am a chicken shit to this day. I am a chicken shit. Noah and I just a few months ago watched some, it wasn't even, it was a movie. of course it was about a serial killer and. Yeti. I couldn't even take the dog out. Like he had to come out with me to take the dog out

Chrus:

this is

Sarah:

or I took the dog out and came in real quick. Like I was like, I can't do that. I can't do that. I can't be out

Chrus:

do it. I can't do it. Um, so this is a, just a, just a little note about how your brain changes when you have babies, that I based part of my personality on liking horror things, like gross things, Stephen King, scary things, I liked all of it. I liked it when the guy got eaten in Jaws, I thought, I thought watching the Godfather and all the violent bloody parts. I thought that was amazing. I was like eight the and then I had a baby and just the idea of watching a scary movie or a gross movie turned my stomach and it really changed since. there's a whole lot of horror movies that have come out since then. And I have zero interest. Like I'll still read a Stephen King book, but I think mostly because his stuff now isn't,

Sarah:

That's a different.

Chrus:

Yeah, but yeah, that is, that is also a weird thing about how your little brain you squeeze out a baby. Just FYI, for those of you, for our tens and tens of listeners that don't have children, that's what happens.

Sarah:

squeezing one out soon.

Chrus:

Uh, You're gonna,

Sarah:

to lose that and the elasticity in your tits.

Chrus:

that, they're just liquid now. They just take the shape of whatever container they're in.

Sarah:

And I feel like nobody told me that. maybe I should have known, but everybody told me everything else. But the day I had to roll my boobs up into my bra, I was like, why? Nobody told me this. Nobody told me this is what was going to happen. Yeah,

Chrus:

It is literally just pouring them into, that's why they call them cups,

Sarah:

exactly. Not cuffs either. It's cups. Those are legit

Chrus:

with a P, with a P. Alright, let's talk, let's talk a little bit 10 percent happier. what, what did you read? did you read anything about the meditation retreat? Because I'm going to sign us up for one.

Sarah:

Did you read it? Because you were supposed to read it over again.

Chrus:

yeah, I read it over again. I read it, I read, talking about the Buddha and the, the guy who's leading it, the one jubu who's leading it. And he's, Dan Harris stays with him for a little bit. And then he starts talking a bunch of BS and Dan Harris is like, fuck this. It's the same shit. Um,

Sarah:

legit. yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Chrus:

so here's what I took away from this chapter. A, I hope those things don't cost like 20, 000 because we're going to do one.

Sarah:

Okay. We have to sell some t shirts first. That's what that'll go towards. Okay.

Chrus:

because I want to see the two of us in a location where we can't talk. Can you imagine?

Sarah:

have to go to separate ones. There's no fucking way we can go to the same one. There's no fucking way. There is none. We would get kicked the fuck out and blacklisted from anything meditation wise ever. There will be no chance of me ever meeting Dan Harris. It will ruin my dreams. We can't do it. Do you remember the time we tried to do yoga in your little apartment? We ended up sitting on the couch smoking cigarettes watching you.

Chrus:

Classic. Classic. Okay. Yeah. We'll have to go to, we'll have to go to separate ones, but

Sarah:

I do want to go to one, but we can't, we absolutely cannot do it together.

Chrus:

Amazing to me. this is after Dan Harris has been doing yoga. This is after Dan Harris has been doing meditation for A year. And he can't get like two breaths into it because he's so by the saliva in his mouth was my favorite thing.

Sarah:

I legit was like, that's a thing. That's definitely a thing. That, that is, it's a thing. I get it. I get it. Yep.

Chrus:

watching how terrible he feels at the beginning and then watching his journey through talking to this teacher and talking to that teacher and understanding that a lot of the reason you think it's terrible is because you're trying to do something and you should not be trying to do anything and the fact that you and I are so action oriented that makes all of this hard for us.

Sarah:

Yeah. Yeah, very much

Chrus:

Eight minutes of meditation and out of that I probably actually meditate for two and the rest of it I'm like, hey, don't do it. Hey. Hey, Hey, that's a thought. Hey, that's a thought. That's a thought. That's a thought

Sarah:

so that was the thing I thought was really interesting. And cause you know me, like I, the words I read them, they come in through my eyeballs and out through my ass immediately. And

Chrus:

Gross,

Sarah:

things out of my ears. I don't know, out of my nose. I don't know, whatever. They leave my body really quickly. But one of the things that grabbed my attention here was at the beginning, if you look at his italicized words, those are, what's going through his head while he was trying to meditate. And at the beginning it's thoughts, they're actual thoughts. And then after he catches on to this, Oh, wait a second, I'm trying too hard. I need to just be aware. And so then you look at his italicized words after that and their awareness and there's a distinct difference. And I know this might sound basic to you, but it was a very, it was a big revelation to me because there's a distinct difference between them. Like at the beginning. Sorry, you're gonna hear my book. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry, but at the beginning, of course, I go too far.

Chrus:

this

Sarah:

He's Like in, out, in, out. Holy crap. I think my feet are gonna snap off at the ankle. Come on, dude. It feels like a dinosaur has my ribcage in its mouth. I'm hungry. It's really quiet in here. Did I just hear a bell? Is that a bell? No, it's not a bell. Shit, shit, shit. fuck. There's, there will be no break in here. these are all his beginning thoughts. wonder if there will be more of that fresh bread at dinner.

Chrus:

oh That will always be my thought

Sarah:

Yeah. did someone actually invent and patent the sneeze guard or like math and language was it devised in several disconnected civilizations? But then you go to where he had this meeting with what's or nots, who was that spring. and she tells him you're trying too hard. You need to just sit. and just sit with whatever's there. And it's Oh, wait a second. So it's not that complicated. I was just making it complicated. So then the next time he sits the difference is the neck now he's conscious and what's going on and it's just a thought of neck pain knee pain Airplane overhead bird song sizzle of rustle sizzle of rustling leaves breeze on my forearm

Chrus:

Yes.

Sarah:

Hands feel stiff, bird, feet numb, but it's not a, it's not, wow, I'm having neck pain. Wonder why I'm having a neck pain so bad. Am I doing it wrong that I'm having the neck pain? Oh, there's an airplane overhead. Wonder what type of airplane it

Chrus:

Where's it going?

Sarah:

the airplane? It's not that. It's neck pain, knee pain, airplane. Like you're just going on and eventually he writes it as if it's the one word. Like feet, bird, feet, bird, feet, bird, back, feet, bird, back, feet, hat, heart,

Chrus:

feed bird. Yes.

Sarah:

that was. Again, I, it might sound elementary to some, but that was a huge takeaway from me in this. because in my meditation, now I'm doing 15 minute meditation pieces, with Peloton. And I started, I did seven days of 10 minutes. Yesterday was my first 15 minutes. The majority of the time, because one of the things she tells you to do is when you fill your mind. Going that you just need to calmly breathe and say to yourself, think, and bring it back in and concentrate on your heart and where your energy is coming from, blah, blah, blah. The majority of the time I'm going to think, and then I get back and I get there like tingly hands. Like I get there, but the amount of time I stay there is extremely small.

Chrus:

right. I'm like, I'm doing it. I'm doing it.

Sarah:

And that was the other thing is like he goes through this period so he has this like Epiphany that he's figured it out. And he's, he has these moments that are just amazing after this. Some huge clear clarity and, and then it goes away and that's what, and that's what the whole process is. And he talks about, he refers to that awareness as the choiceless awareness, but when you realize that, and I think I've said this before, it's like a sport, it's like a language, it's musical instrument. Everything that you do requires practice. You didn't just, unless you're some prodigy or something, you just, you didn't just sit down at the piano and play some insanely beautiful song. You had to learn, what are they called? The keys scales. You had to learn all of that shit. you have to do that. So I can say that in my 10 minutes that I've been doing in the 15 minutes, I have not once. Thought when is this going to be over? I've gotten to the end and been like, oh wow, we're open. We're fluttering our eyes already. Are we fluttering our eyes? Oh my goodness. We're fluttering our eyes. Okay.

Chrus:

Exactly. Hang on second, because I have something important to say there, but I am

Sarah:

done. I'm done.

Chrus:

going to pee my pants,

Sarah:

Oh, don't pee your pants I don't want you to pee your pants.

Chrus:

I'm going to.

Sarah:

isn't cool. I don't care what anybody says. Are you on mute? Did you mute yourself? Because I can't hear you. I'm assuming you're on mute. Nope, she broke something. You're on. Oh, nope. She's shutting herself. Oh my, I don't know what she's doing. I'm commentating it all for the audience though. I

Chrus:

tell you, if you're quiet, this will just cut itself all out when it takes out the pauses. I'm going to mute myself and go pee. Hello.

Sarah:

did it. I was quiet the whole time. I meditated for three seconds.

Chrus:

And then talk to your brain and say, Hey,

Sarah:

And then a squirrel went through my brain. I was like, whew!

Chrus:

good. sorry. but here's what happened to me while I was meditating that I wanted to share with you. instructions during the meditation are to like find where you feel your breath. And then concentrate on your breath, right? So I'm doing that. And I then make up more instructions for myself because obviously with my decades of meditation experience and having, ingested parts of the Buddha along the way, I know better about how to meditate. I'm like, I think this is maybe your problem with meditation is that you don't. You don't get to,

Sarah:

The family just got home. Give me a second, I gotta close the door.

Chrus:

okay, like you don't, I don't get to decide the, meditate,

Sarah:

Yeah.

Chrus:

just meditate. Don't make it complicated. Don't be like, oh, we have to have a mantra. Let, because that's what I did. I was like, I don't think, I don't think I'm gonna just concentrate on my breathing. I'm gonna give it, you I'm gonna give it an and an ah and Why?

Sarah:

and sometimes you do that.

Chrus:

Why,

Sarah:

when you Yeah, you don't have to, like Sometimes you do that,

Chrus:

Just do it. And then I would feel like I was, like, I was meditating pretty good for eight seconds. And then I would be like, I'm doing it.

Sarah:

Yeah. Exactly. Yep.

Chrus:

good job. Good job, Christine. You're doing it. Here's your kudos. Now go back to breathing. Good

Sarah:

you feel when you're done? Like my girl, it's always now slowly flutter your eyes open. do you, how do you feel when you flutter your eyes open? Do you close your eyes? First of all, cause I know some people can't, I normally can't, but when doing this, I seem to be okay with it.

Chrus:

I got to ease into the eyes closing. So when I find a comfortable position, like I find a comfortable position, start your breathing, find out where your breathing is, like gently close your eyes. Like I have to sneak up on the eye closing. So

Sarah:

another thing I did differently is when I started, I actually now Only the last two have I sat up. I found a very comfortable space downstairs to sit up, but I've been laying on the floor because I originally just sitting up was like annoying to me and I wasn't getting anywhere. So I started laying on the floor and that seemed to help me. but, cause I remember being told there's no rules, so that was what I needed to do to get started. And it's starting to make sense. it's still obviously, full seven, nine days into it.

Chrus:

Let me tell you how to do it.

Sarah:

No, plenty of ways to go, but it's making more sense. Like I'm, I can see the progression in my brain of this is a bunch of bullshit. I will never be able to do this to gaining confidence. Like I, these 15 minute sessions, I'm pretty sure that's as long as I'm going to go for a while. Cause I need to work on it before I do much longer than that. but I'm very pleased with it.

Chrus:

Yeah, I'm having a good time and when I'm done, I feel the same way I do after a yoga class. because that's how you spend like the last four or five minutes of the yoga class. You're just laying there on the floor, like a turd. and you're just finding a comfortable position and going through scanning. And, and

Sarah:

that's what, when I'm done and this is going to sound real kooky, here's one of those things that you're like, bullshit when I'm done. I never forget where I am. Like, I always know I'm in my living room on the floor. it's not like I forget that, but when I'm done and I opened my eyes and the lights above and I take in what's around me, it's almost as though I did forget where I was. I know that might not make sense to anybody, but

Chrus:

no, I,

Sarah:

the feeling. I'm like, Oh, okay.

Chrus:

Here we are in new.

Sarah:

And now let's move on.

Chrus:

And then what I like is after I'm done with the meditation, there's three or four little things I can listen to that are about meditation. So it's not necessarily a guided meditation, but it's more of, Hey, here's how this philosophy lines up with this thing. Here's why we do this mindfulness thing. And here's the kind of like the neuroscience behind it, which I.

Sarah:

that part of your app?

Chrus:

that's the uh, me, what's it called? I can never remember. Waking Up is the app that I'm using. You're doing the Peloton add on. Right?

Sarah:

Yeah, it's just, it's one of the Peloton workouts, the Peloton thing that we pay monthly for the bike and the tread. We, it's one of the things included all sorts of meditation and yoga, but that's the other meditation and workouts and stuff. I said yoga cause I think I'm going to start doing yoga now. if I can sit and for 15 minutes and like meditate, I think I can try some little bit of yoga.

Chrus:

Yoga's fun. Um, I also got told by my doctor that I needed to do something else that wasn't just yoga. I felt

Sarah:

I also walk. I haven't been walking because I'm terrible because I'm getting out of my routines. But

Chrus:

Right? We gotta,

Sarah:

other

Chrus:

we gotta refresh some atomic habits.

Sarah:

Yeah, I definitely need to I definitely need to

Chrus:

All right, let's do that. Let's do that for next week. I want you to refresh a habit and do it like three times

Sarah:

I can do that. I

Chrus:

and I will

Sarah:

I did love this chapter. I did love this chapter. I'm watching the progression of it and then the, I, the up or the down and then the up and then down again. And it's just a reminder that's just how it's not going to be perfect. And even at the end of it, he still has a shit ton of questions, which we all do.

Chrus:

right, And the more I do it, the more interesting it is for me to understand changes in brain chemistry, right? Like we were, Like, those are the things that kind of hook me in versus the spiritual Buddha kind of stuff. And it's fun for me to, watch somebody be a kind of religious skeptic. And come into this and learn to appreciate some of the Buddhist teachings about it, but, but also it really connect with people who are scientific and listening to the podcast and the array of sciencey sort of people like that come on the 10 percent happier podcast and talk about actual train changes and brain chemistry that come along with this, make it feel real to

Sarah:

yeah, for sure.

Chrus:

And it doesn't have to be Buddhist and it doesn't have to be spiritual and it doesn't have to be, nature related. although your, your brains are nature. So, I mean, I like I like that piece of it and I like the fact that I can relate it back to the exercise. Like I can't see the effects of exercise. Like I can't see the effects of doing the yoga except for that. I can sit crisscross applesauce without my knees falling out of my body.

Sarah:

Great.

Chrus:

So yeah, you're going to do yoga. I'll tell you my yoga.

Sarah:

a shot.

Chrus:

Do you have the yoga on the Peloton? Cause I have an app for that too. And

Sarah:

have it all on the Peloton. Oh,

Chrus:

the TV. And it was just like I was at class, except for there weren't, a lot of people who are better at yoga.

Sarah:

I have yoga blocks and all kinds of shit.

Chrus:

Oh, mostly I'm just leaning on the coffee tables.

Sarah:

Yeah, we'll see how that goes. But,

Chrus:

All right. I am a, I'm off to target to buy a, to buy Olivia and air fryer.

Sarah:

Awesome, I am gonna go put together my new refrigerator.

Chrus:

Oh, so exciting.

Sarah:

Yay! And move all the food back upstairs, so we don't have to walk downstairs when we want creamer for the coffee.

Chrus:

Makes sense. Makes

Sarah:

super excited. Alright, I'm digging it, I'm digging everything we're doing. Love you, bye.

Chrus:

Love you!

People on this episode

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Christine Kanalis

Host
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Sarah Leibhart

Host